You're Catch-22!
by Joseph Heller
Incredibly witty and funny, you have a taste for irony in all that you
see. It seems that life has put you in perpetually untenable situations, and your sense
of humor is all that gets you through them. These experiences have also made you an
ardent pacifist, though you present your message with tongue sewn into cheek. You
could coin a phrase that replaces the word "paradox" for millions of
people.
Take the Book Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.
Thursday, February 26, 2004
Friday, February 20, 2004
a series of liam's wake-ups
2/3
I'm feeling like a subpar parent.
liam's first words this morning were, "is your headache gone yet? can I have the remote?"
2/5
liam at 7:30:
mom, can I watch tv? where is the remote? hey mom, you have been letting me watch tv every day! how about if we only watch tv on fridays and saturdays!
me: it's thursday
liam: okay, how about we only watch tv on thursdays, and on thursdays we'll watch tv allllll day. hey, mom, do you need to sleep? hey mom, I'll bet you love me, right mom?
me: yes I love you
liam: you love me so much that you never want me to leave?
me: um. no until you're ready.
liam: when I'm ready I can go to the park all by myself?
me: no, NO, stay in bed, I meant when you are a grown up and you're ready
liam: when I'm a grown up you'll be old, mom. hey mom, someday you'll die! do you need to sleep, mom?
2/6
liam at 8 AM:
mom, are there any trains in new orleans?
me: yes
liam: ther are LOTS of trains in new orleans, right? maybe ten? and even some in algiers point! and also trolleys. more trolleys than trains even. hey! did you hear that? was that a train or a boat?
2/10
liam at 8 AM: "did I sleep? I didn't sleep. I did NOT sleep. you need to sleep, I don't."
2/11
liam at 7:30:
mom, is our car broken? when our car was broken, they had to come with a tow truck. with ALL the tow trucks. someday our car will be broken again, because, when it's time to die, all of the meteors will come down. because, mom, there's lots of worlds. and mom, someday YOU will have a birthday. I want you to have a surprise party.
2/13
Liam at 8:30: can I watch my video now? can I watch it RIGHT NOW?
(after a stomping and screaming interlude, then there was some cuddling, and I said-)
me: mmmm, you're good for eating!
liam: and YOU are good for sleeping, mom! you are really good at sleeping. ha ha, you are the best sleeper I know! does it make you laugh when I say that, mom?
2/16
liam at 8 AM:
did I fell asleep before the end of chitty chitty bang bang? can I watch it again right now? is the sun all the way up?
2/17
liam at 8:15 AM:
I dreamed that I was in a soccer game at monkey hill, with my friends, and I went backwards from the way that you are supposed to go, I was up on the ramp part, kicking the ball up and up and up and then down the wooden part, and I was really kicking the way that my friends teached me.
me: who were these friends?
liam: you KNOW, my FRIENNNNNDS
me: were they people I know?
liam: one was a boy, one was a girl, and they were older than me. they were not teenagers, they were not grown-ups, but they were older than me.
nash: of course they weren't grown-ups. why in the heck would you have friends who were grown-ups?
me: well you guys have friends who are grown-ups.
liam: yeah, like Kami!
2/19
liam at 7:45:
mom what day is it?
(and then, after a discussion of days)
can I watch some tv now?
me: if you can be very quiet
liam: you mean not yell and sing?
me: right. I need for you to let your bother rest, and let me rest, too.
liam: (exasperated sigh) but mom, I just love rockin too much! I just want to be rockin all day.
2/20
liam is off to the doctor for more shots.
he woke up around 8:30 and started playing right away with his mini flashlight bead - a muses catch - and I think his first words to me were, "open up and let me have a look, mom! you're a very good patient..."
poor kid. I think this is the last round. I hope so.
2/3
I'm feeling like a subpar parent.
liam's first words this morning were, "is your headache gone yet? can I have the remote?"
2/5
liam at 7:30:
mom, can I watch tv? where is the remote? hey mom, you have been letting me watch tv every day! how about if we only watch tv on fridays and saturdays!
me: it's thursday
liam: okay, how about we only watch tv on thursdays, and on thursdays we'll watch tv allllll day. hey, mom, do you need to sleep? hey mom, I'll bet you love me, right mom?
me: yes I love you
liam: you love me so much that you never want me to leave?
me: um. no until you're ready.
liam: when I'm ready I can go to the park all by myself?
me: no, NO, stay in bed, I meant when you are a grown up and you're ready
liam: when I'm a grown up you'll be old, mom. hey mom, someday you'll die! do you need to sleep, mom?
2/6
liam at 8 AM:
mom, are there any trains in new orleans?
me: yes
liam: ther are LOTS of trains in new orleans, right? maybe ten? and even some in algiers point! and also trolleys. more trolleys than trains even. hey! did you hear that? was that a train or a boat?
2/10
liam at 8 AM: "did I sleep? I didn't sleep. I did NOT sleep. you need to sleep, I don't."
2/11
liam at 7:30:
mom, is our car broken? when our car was broken, they had to come with a tow truck. with ALL the tow trucks. someday our car will be broken again, because, when it's time to die, all of the meteors will come down. because, mom, there's lots of worlds. and mom, someday YOU will have a birthday. I want you to have a surprise party.
2/13
Liam at 8:30: can I watch my video now? can I watch it RIGHT NOW?
(after a stomping and screaming interlude, then there was some cuddling, and I said-)
me: mmmm, you're good for eating!
liam: and YOU are good for sleeping, mom! you are really good at sleeping. ha ha, you are the best sleeper I know! does it make you laugh when I say that, mom?
2/16
liam at 8 AM:
did I fell asleep before the end of chitty chitty bang bang? can I watch it again right now? is the sun all the way up?
2/17
liam at 8:15 AM:
I dreamed that I was in a soccer game at monkey hill, with my friends, and I went backwards from the way that you are supposed to go, I was up on the ramp part, kicking the ball up and up and up and then down the wooden part, and I was really kicking the way that my friends teached me.
me: who were these friends?
liam: you KNOW, my FRIENNNNNDS
me: were they people I know?
liam: one was a boy, one was a girl, and they were older than me. they were not teenagers, they were not grown-ups, but they were older than me.
nash: of course they weren't grown-ups. why in the heck would you have friends who were grown-ups?
me: well you guys have friends who are grown-ups.
liam: yeah, like Kami!
2/19
liam at 7:45:
mom what day is it?
(and then, after a discussion of days)
can I watch some tv now?
me: if you can be very quiet
liam: you mean not yell and sing?
me: right. I need for you to let your bother rest, and let me rest, too.
liam: (exasperated sigh) but mom, I just love rockin too much! I just want to be rockin all day.
2/20
liam is off to the doctor for more shots.
he woke up around 8:30 and started playing right away with his mini flashlight bead - a muses catch - and I think his first words to me were, "open up and let me have a look, mom! you're a very good patient..."
poor kid. I think this is the last round. I hope so.
Wednesday, February 11, 2004
I was catching up on blog reading - I only read blogs once a week or less, so I got caught up on smallhands, which is my favorite, and then read some more, including esperanza, and felt inspired to check out her partner's blog: radikal papi
cool!
cool!
liam at 7:30:
mom, is our car broken? when our car was broken, they had to come with a tow truck. with ALL the tow trucks. someday our car will be broken again, because, when it's time to die, all of the meteors will come down. because, mom, there's lots of worlds. and mom, someday YOU will have a birthday. I want you to have a surprise party.
(I thought for sure he was going to say that someday I would die, since he tells me this at least once a day. I am allowed to get as old as grandpa, whom he thinks will die very soon. my father is in pretty good health.)
mom, is our car broken? when our car was broken, they had to come with a tow truck. with ALL the tow trucks. someday our car will be broken again, because, when it's time to die, all of the meteors will come down. because, mom, there's lots of worlds. and mom, someday YOU will have a birthday. I want you to have a surprise party.
(I thought for sure he was going to say that someday I would die, since he tells me this at least once a day. I am allowed to get as old as grandpa, whom he thinks will die very soon. my father is in pretty good health.)
Thursday, February 05, 2004
last night's news:
1: it HAILED tonight! ice all over my front porch. I love that stuff. Nash is going to be so pissed that he missed it.
2: free will astrology
I rarely employ my mediumistic skills, but a host of spirits was just clamoring to address you this week. So I agreed to channel five of them, on the condition that they'd be brief and to the point. Here, then, are your advisors from the other side of the veil. First, Wernher von Braun: "Research is what you do when you don't know what you're doing." Second, A.A. Milne: "One of the advantages of being disorderly is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries." Next, Ralph Waldo Emerson: "Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis." Casey Stengel: "You're lost but you're making good time." Harry S. Truman: "If you can't convince 'em, confuse 'em."
1: it HAILED tonight! ice all over my front porch. I love that stuff. Nash is going to be so pissed that he missed it.
2: free will astrology
I rarely employ my mediumistic skills, but a host of spirits was just clamoring to address you this week. So I agreed to channel five of them, on the condition that they'd be brief and to the point. Here, then, are your advisors from the other side of the veil. First, Wernher von Braun: "Research is what you do when you don't know what you're doing." Second, A.A. Milne: "One of the advantages of being disorderly is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries." Next, Ralph Waldo Emerson: "Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis." Casey Stengel: "You're lost but you're making good time." Harry S. Truman: "If you can't convince 'em, confuse 'em."
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